Whats Inside

 

Ek Baar 3 Chor Nilesh, Rathee Aur Lalit Police Se Chhup Ke 3 Boriyon Mein Ghus Gaye.

Police Wala Aaya, Usne Pehli Bori Mein Laat Mari.
Nilesh Bola:Bhow-Bhow
Police Wala: Kutta Hai

Dusri Bori Mein Laat Mari.
Rathee Bola:Meoooowwwww
Police Wala: Billi Hai

Teesri Bori Mein Laat Mari,
Koi Awaaz Nahi Aayi.
Phir Mari, Koi Awaz Nahi.
20-25 Laat Maari To Andar Se Lalit Chillaya: Abey Ulloo ke pathe, Aaloo Hoon Aaloo

Inaam de ke..

Police wale ne carwale ko roka- "yeh suraksha week hai. Aap belt pehn
kar car chala rahe hain, isliye aapko Rs 5,000 ka inaam
dia jata hai. aap is inaam ka kya karoge ?"

car driver- "mein iss inaam se apna driving license banwaunga"

Sath wali seat par baithi uski Biwi boli- "inki bat ka yakin mat karo.
ye sharab pi kr kuch b bolte hain."

Pichli Seat se uske bache bole- "Hume pata tha ki chori ki car me
hm zyada dur nhi ja payenge."

Tabhi dikki se awaz ayi-
"Bhai appan border par kar lia  ?.........

Foreigner

A Bengali babu returns from China.

Bengali asks wife: Do I look like a foreigner ?

Wife: No.

Bengali: Look carefully, do I look like a foreigner ?

Wife again replies: No.

By now Mr Bengali was fuming.
Bengali yells: All those women in China were fools. Where ever I visited, they all said: "Look a foreigner"

Antaryami Maharaj

Santa Ek Jyotish Ke Paas Kundli Dikhane Gaya.

Jyotish: Tera Naam Santa Singh Hai?

Santa: Ji Maharaj

Jyotish: Tujhe Do Ladki & Ek Ladka Hai?

Santa: ji Maharaj

Jyotish: Tune Abhi 10 Kilo Chawal Kharide Hai?

Santa: Haan, Oye Aap To Antaryami Ho

Jyotish: Bete Agli Baar Aana, To Kundli Lana Ration Card Nahi

What is communicated and what actually reaches..

From : Managing Director
To : Executive Director
"Tomorrow morning there will be a total eclipse of the sun at nine o'clock. This is something which we cannot see everyday, so let the workers line up outside .On this rare occurrence, I will personally explain the phenomenon to them. If it is raining  the work force should assemble in the canteen."

From : Executive Director
To : Departmental Head
"By order of the Managing Director, there will be a total eclipse of the sun at nine o' clock tomorrow morning. If it is raining the disappearance of the sun will be followed through in the canteen. This is something we cannot see happening everyday."

From : Departmental Heads
To : Sectional Heads
"By order of the Managing Director, we shall follow the disappearance of the sun in the canteen at nine o'clock tomorrow morning. The Managing Director will tell us whether it is going to rain. This is something which we cannot see happen everyday."

From : Section Heads
To : Foreman
"If it is raining in the canteen tomorrow morning, which is something that we cannot see happen everyday, the Managing Director will disappear at nine o' clock."

From : Foreman
To : All Operators
"Tomorrow morning at nine o' clock, the Managing Director will disappear. It's a pity that we can't see this happen everyday."

Promise to be kept

Papu- Papa Good News H.
Snta- Kya?
Papu- Aapko Yaad Hai Apne Kaha Tha Ki Agr Main Exam Me Paas Ho Jaun Toh Mujhe Rs.5000 Denge.


Santa- Han.

Papu- Aapke 5000 Bach Gaye!.

Saans ki Takleef

Santa: Dr Sahab Mujhe Subah-2 Sans Lene me takleef hoti hai

Docter: Beta Jaldi Utha karo Subah-subah saari oxygen to Baba Ramdev K chele khinch lete Hai

In Hurry..

A photographer for a national magazine was assigned to take pictures of a great forest fire. He was advised that a small plane would be waiting to fly him over the fire.

The photographer arrived at the airstrip just an hour before sundown. Sure enough, a small Cessna airplane was waiting.

He jumped in with his equipment and shouted, "Let's go!" The tense man sitting in the pilot's seat swung the plane into the wind and soon they were in the air, though flying erratically.

"Fly over the north side of the fire," said the photographer, "and make several low-level passes."

"Why?" asked the nervous pilot.

"Because I'm going to take pictures!" yelled the photographer. "I'm a photographer, and photographers take pictures."

The pilot replied, "You mean you're not the flight instructor?"

Chota Sardar

Ek baar 3 sardar picnic par gaye.

Wahan ja kar yaad aya ke "PEPSI" to ghar bhul aye,Decide kiya ki sab se chota sardar ja kar pepsi le aaye,

Chota sardar: "Mai is shart pe jaunga ke jab tak mai nahi aaun, tum ek bhi samosa nahi khaoge".

Dono sardaro ne kaha "OK".

2 din gujar gaye, 

4 din ho gayeâ

 chota sardar nahi aya,

 socha ke ab samose kha lene chahyeâ

 

Jaise hi samosa uthaya chota sardar ped ke peche se nikal ke bola "Aisa karoge to mai nahi jaunga".